HORNY OLD THING

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No, not our president or his pals Roger Ailes and Bill O’Reilly. I’m talking about a 112-million-year-old dinosaur found by chance in Canada, at the Suncor Millennium Mine near Fort McMurray in 2011.

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Not only is this a new species of nodosaur, or armored dinosaur, but it’s the best-preserved one ever found. Meaning that paleontologists can examine its mummified skin and will eventually decode the contents of its fossilized last supper.

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If you happen to be in the vicinity of the Royal Terrell Museum of Paleontology in Alberta, stop on by to see the exhibit.

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Creationists excepted.

 

Bye-Bye Billy

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Bill O’Reilly has been spouting lies, spin, innuendo, racism, bigotry, misogyny, and other assorted filth for 20 years. So why now? Fox brass knew about his millions of hush-money payouts yet evidently didn’t care as they signed him on for many more years of bilge-spouting for profit. What was the tipping point?

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I don’t believe for a nano-second that advertiser boycotts or social media outrage was the primary reason. Nope. I look to the sky instead. As in, Sky News. Rupert Murdoch was thwarted in this total takeover bid in 2011 when the phone-hacking scandal of his ethics-challenged rags in the UK was throttling full-steam-ahead. Now, he’s trying to buy it again. You think the UK regulators who gave him the boot the first time will look kindly upon a corporation knowingly aiding and abetting an employee who buys the silence of multiple accusers? Whose brass have always looked the other way? The execrable Bill Shine, Roger Ailes’ trusted lieutenant, is still in charge there, right?

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Imagine a world, if you will, without Murdoch slime in it.

Way, way too late to undo the damage.

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But at least one less swamp creature will be terrorizing the locals.

BILL O’BLOVIATE

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It is quite telling that when Mother Jones exposed the fraudulent “combat” claims of Bill O’Reilly–who experienced Falklands fighting from a mere 1,200 miles away in Buenos Aires, like the rest of the American journalists banned from the Islands during the fight with the British–he responded with insults.

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What he should have responded with was the truth.

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As if.

DOWNSIZE BILL

Not long ago our favorite Minnesota loon, Michele Bachmann, told the world that—despite having run for president—Americans aren’t “ready” for a female in charge at the White House.

Um…maybe they weren’t ready to have a Minnesota loon in the White House, but let’s not go there, shall we?

Still, Bill O’Reilly found that statement too juicy to ignore, so he had Kirsten Powers and Kate Obenshain on his show, and asked them, “There’s got to be some downside to having a woman president, right?”

Their silence was deafening.

When they did get over their shock, and called Bill out on his misogynistic flippancy, I just wish they had asked Bill to pose this unbelievably stupid question to Germany’s Angela Merkel.

Or Argentina’s Cristina Fernandez de Kirchner.

Or Costa Rica’s Laura Chinchilla.

Or Brazil’s Dilma Rousseff.

Or Malawi’s Joyce Banda.

Or South Korea’s Park Geun-hye.